Sunday, April 10, 2011

Empty Lot of the Week


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13th and Market

    Ah jeez, where do I begin with this one? This dirty-ass surface parking lot conveniently located at our urban core always serves as a reminder that Philadelphia still has a loooong way to go. Shitting distance from city hall, surrounded by hotels, strong retail, and a big motherfucking convention center, this lot is a huge dick-slap in the face to every citizen, tourist, and bum that walks by.

    About 10,000 different developments would work just fine right here. Another hotel? Sure. The Convention Center Expansion’s Expansion? Sure, why the hell not. Condo? I’m sure someone would enjoy the view. Giant statue of me? I’m fine with it. Movie Studio? Wasn’t there a plan for that there once? (Help me out here, Philly nerds) SURFACE PARKING LOT? Nooooo!

     I’d rather have the world’s tallest check cashing place than a surface lot. I’d rather see a skyscraper in the shape of one of those rat balloons the unions put out when they protest. I’d rather have a quantum singularity there sucking people into oblivion. People would hate it but you could just say “better than a surface lot” and they’d shut the fuck up. 

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