Hello, this is Robert Stack, and you are now reading this in my voice. Philadelphia has gone through a lot of changes since GroJLart's shitty blog began, and now I'm here to give you all the updates on the many empty lots in this city that are no more (or about to be). Play the youtube embedded below to hear the appropriate background music.
Dranoff Properties has re-designed their plan for the Schuylkill River NIMBY Lot. The new design will have underground mechanized parking and be slightly taller. The sorely-needed cafe portion of the project is now gone, due to NIMBY concerns about "noise". Note: this location is next to an active freight line (noise) and across the river from the Schuylkill Expressway (NOISE). So apparently this cafe was going to be pretty fucking loud. Oh well, fuck 'em... its getting built!
The Franklintown Shituation Lot is soon to meet its maker! Mega-developer Forest City was serious when they spoke of creating a second phase to Museum Towers, filling this 4-decade-old lot once and for all! The lot will get a very plain-looking 188 foot tower, a new parking garage, and a bunch of big-ass town homes that will hide it.
Kieth's Sanslot is soon to be no more! The heroes at Brickstone Realty have come along to finally put this shitty lot out of its misery and give new life to Chestnut East! Their new development will add a shitload of apartments to the corridor, a bunch of new retail, and a rumored supermarket to the street. On top of that, a Butt-Fugly Building will finally get demolished! This is the kind of development dickheads like me have always dreamed would come to this location! Good Luck!
|Latest rendering. Rumor has it that the development might even take more of the block than seen here!|
The Penn's Landing Lot of Doom has (yet another) new plan for its removal. A new feasibility study by Hargreaves Associates has just been completed, with plans to reconnect the site of this lot with the rest of the city. There's really too much to talk about in one little blurb, so here's an extremely detailed report that explains everything.
The South Street Dread Lot FINALLY has a plan! After years and years of nothingness, this piece of shit lot may finally come to an end. A developer called Silk Companies plans 21 condo units for the site, with a whacky-looking building designed by ISA Design Studios facing the South Street side. Read all about it here.
The Franklintown and RDA Fail Lot is getting even more Mormoned than originally planned! Not only will a Mormon Temple be built on the site, but also a Mormon Meeting House and a 32-story residential building designed by Robert A.M. Stern!! Holy shit! Literally!
Another long-term empty lot, NIMBY Memorial West, has plans to be eliminated. The heroic Carl Dranoff plans a gifuckinggantic Hotel/Condo that will stand here and on the sites of the Philly International Records Building and 311 South Broad. It will run under the SLS International brand and will be the tallest building east of Broad Street. Hopefully this isn't a pipe dream and will actually get built. Good fucking luck!! Here's every last rendering of the thing you can think of.
The First Regiment Armory Lot is also about to be eliminated. This 35-year-old empty lot will soon be covered by Hanover North Broad, a two-building development that will wipe out both this lot and its twin across the street. The Hanover Company, based out of Houston, is teaming up with Parkway Corp to get this done. Though its probably not the most ideal building for this lot, its much much better than a shitty surface lot.
The Mercantile Liblotary is back up for sale. Have $1.69 Million to burn? You can now own this failure of architecture and urban planning that is more ass-kissed than anything but Guild House. Here's the listing!
The Shitz Carlton Waldorf Awhoria Fail Lot will hopefully be dead soon. The Warrior-Poet Brook Lenfest released a new rendering to the nerds on Skyscraper Page showing a brand new design for his W Hotel/Element, which is scheduled to break ground sooner than you think. This definitely needs to happen.
|Excellent, though blue doesn't have to be the color.|
The Great NIMBY Memorial is now, finally, a construction site. Toll Brothers is now building 410 at Society Hill, putting an end to that shitbag lot. Hopefully, this fulfills all the hopes and dreams of all those NIMBYs who put an end to all the good developments that were proposed here.
|Again, I didn't say it was pretty.|
A new proposal has come to the Schuylkill Sea. Coming on down from NP International is River Walk Philadelphia, a 650-unit condo complex with multiple buildings and perhaps a supermarket. Of course, keep in mind that this is probably the 20th project proposed for this lot in the last 6 decades. If NP pulls this off, they will have accomplished something no other developer could pull off before. Good fucking luck.
|There are so many dead proposals for this space that I still haven't told you about all of them.|
For every empty lot, effed-up building, or new development, there's someone, somewhere, who knows the truth. Perhaps that someone is reading this. Perhaps... it's you. If you have any new or extra information relating to articles posted at Philaphilia, write to us at firstname.lastname@example.org. You need not give your name.
|"Now get the fuck out of here."|