3680 Walnut Street
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| Ah jeez. Image from Microsoft. |
What happened to cool looking theatres? Really, what the fuck happened? The Academy of Music, the Musical Fund Hall, the Walnut Street Theatre, the three Chestnut Street Theatres, the Trocadero, the two Forrest Theatres, the Broad Street Theatre, the Victoria, the Boyd... these were built to be attractive and attract people. This motherfucker makes even the Kimmel Center look like the fucking Chrysler Building. It's not very inviting to have a giant blank wall and a diagonal wall of windows facing everyone.
In 1966, the Annenberg School of Communications at the University of Pennsylvania needed a space for performances. Walter Annenberg, the mighty business tycoon-philanthropist, gave over the dough to build and run the place. This crazy motherfucker was so rich that he wiped his ass with more money than this thing cost. Seriously, this guy was so loaded that he could have funded a performing arts center 10,000 feet tall made of platinum.
The school, for some dumbass reason, decided to go with Vincent Kling for the architect. Vincent Kling is responsible for some of the ugliest piles of concrete lard in the city and he made no exception here. I would call him Vincent Klingon, but Klingons have way better architecture than this shit.
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| Model of the place before it was built. |
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| The main entrance when it was new. Told ya it was crap. |
It's awful inside, too. The carpet is this horrible orange color, the lighting is mostly fluorescent, and the theater part is like an afterthought-- the main space, the bit with the tall atrium, is a foyer that mostly gets used for wine-and-cheese fundraising events, during which they kick out all the students who want to use the Arts Center for, you know, artistic activities.
ReplyDeleteWalter Annenberg Farted when it all started
ReplyDeletelong before the art he carted away
A gangster's son doing time, making amends for his father's crime
he married three times trying to get it right but left no son for his own birthright
long before the art he carted away
Taste in art just can’t be bought
neither can class for it is not that way
long before the art he carted away
The Barnes Foundation had a smarter man at the helm
and a dog that could sign one out and sign one in
long before the art he carted away
When Albert C. Barnes went to France
Walter Annenberg farted in his pants
long before the art he carted away
The Philadelphia Inquiry lied now and then
covering up the fact that Barnes was in
while Annenberg pomped with great circumstance with the Queen England
Barnes was in France picking up art that made Walter Dance like a green eyed monster as he farted in his pants for days
long before the art he carted away
Barnes wrote a will that made it clear
his art collection should steer clear
of Annenberg’s sway
So the Annenberg Foundation along with the Pew, Rimel, and Perleman to name a few other Jews
Coveted what Barnes had created with his two bare hands
So they quietly cooked up a state backed takeover plan
that included hoodwinking a Judge and the IRS
you can see in the Film The Art of the Steal as it lays out their crooked-arced deal
As Annenberg farted from his grave
long before the art he carted away
As we look back to the end of the second World War
And the Jews were looking to settle the score
The Monument Men met the call, rounded it all up
and put the Jews art back up on the wall
Much was stated about
Never again
For the sacrifice was great for many a good men and the evil of the war was one big sin
But that was before Annenberg farted and tried to play collector
as his collection paled to that of Barnes’ which was made of honey and nectar
And the $30 Billion dollars that they did steal
would make Trump look like a chump in the Art of the Deal
Everybody altogether now say:
PPEEEEWWWWEEEEEE!
Now Say it Again:
PPEEEWWWWEEEEEEE!
Walter Annenberg’s will said his own collection would go
up to New York City when he grew old
But his was only worth a billion bucks,
For Barnes this was a mere drop in the cup
The moral of the story for those in the know
Is to hide your art before you go
And make sure there’s not a Jew lurking about
Trying to get even with Hitler without a doubt
Walter Annenberg Farted again and again
but just couldn’t erase his father’s sins
and the foundations’ principals that stole the Barnes Collection you know
will meet old Walter in hell where they all will surely go
as Walter Annenberg farted
along with the art he carted away
by Jack Holland http://www.thelastamericannewspaper.com