750 Race Street
It was the 1950s. Mayor Dilworth was spearheading the revitalization of the entire eastern third of Center City. One of the biggest challenges of that revitalization was the renewal of what was known as Skid Row. It was sort of like Deadwood but with the whores and drunks outdoors instead of in. That place really chapped Dilworth's ass. It had a few historical buildings including some of the city's last wooden houses, which became a code violation in 1796.
At the time, there was a movement of creating futuristic looking municipal buildings. People went fucking nuts over it. Designs that looked like some shit you would see in a bad 50's sci-fi movie became reality, and reality fucking bites. This new police HQ was going to be the most high-tech and futuristic one ever seen... in the early 60's. The brand new architecture firm of Geddes Brecher Qualls Cunningham was on the case.
They must of been smoking some pretty good shit because they came up with this goofy-ass plan to create a building consisting of two large cylinders with curving connections between them. They made it look like fucking handcuffs.
|Like this, but a building.|
For some reason, they thought that concrete would stay all shiny and white forever. Apparently, none of them ever looked down and figured out that you shouldn't build a building out of SIDEWALK. Dumbasses. The firm of shitbags that designed this fuckstick thought they were cool as fuck by making it built of big pre-fab concrete panels. Two thousand of them.
|Arangging big pieces of sidewalk into a building. From what it says in the big-ass watermark.|
What do I mean by impracticality? Think about it. Do you think it's fun to put rectilinear furniture and equipment into a curvilinear room? Kiss half of your square footage goodbye. Being inside a big hollow box of concrete blows. It gets moldy and mildewy and it sucks if you need to install any new plumbing or wiring. Over time, the concrete develops holes and crumbly areas, causing a moist drafty building that's paradise for roaches and ants. Literally, the Roundhouse, as it came to be known, is an Arcology of Vermin.
The Police Commissioner has made it clear that they want the fuck out of there, which is the biggest indicator that fifties-futuristic-looking concrete castles are not practical for any damn use... the very people that the building was designed for can't stand it. There's not going to be a new Police HQ built for a looooong fucking time so they will have to continue to suffer because a couple of dumbass shitchitects thought they were cool. Sorry, officers.